Living for Today

Why sit and smile for the camera when you can just float?

     I don't have many spontaneous days anymore so the ones I do have, I tend to think about over and over. It's like doing something crazy does something to my soul. Sets me on a new path. Makes the road a little easier to walk on ...or something. I took the kids out of school on Tuesday and we all went to the beach. Do I feel bad? Not in the least. It was an amazing day. I feel like I am at that point in my life where I am not happy with where I have been but I am able to accept that I am here for a reason and that my future has so much more to offer. I miss the waking up and having nothing to do. I miss the days where I wanted to be an adult...why do we all want to be an adult until we are an adult. I always admired "The adult", I wanted to be that adult. Make my own choices, eat what I wanted, do whatever I pleased....I am surprised my kids even want to be adults because I know I don't make it look easy. A few times a week it's an hour drive to the doctors, it's chores every day, it's whats for dinner, it's how do you make a work at home business work...every day. Then dealing with your own demons but having to push them aside to take care of your children. Thoughts go through my mind every single day about what tomorrow is going to be like and I forget how to live for today.
     That is why taking the kids out of school on Tuesday was so worth it. I was there. It was a live for today moment and I am so, so happy that I did it. The look on my kids faces was enough really...the rest was just follow through. I'd like to not forget to live in the moment more often. To cherish the days we have with our kids. To laugh when they laugh and not be annoyed because boys fart entirely too much in my opinion. Days like Tuesday showed me that being "The Adult" isn't always a bad thing...sometimes, we can be fun too. I hope my kids remember that day longer than I will but even if they don't, it was worth it for the day.
    It's so easy to be caught up in politics, social media, whats for dinner ...we forget that our babies are just babies. They need us. They are looking at us and learning from what we do and quite frankly...I am SCARED for the future. I want my kids to be decent human beings and we have quite a road to follow to get them there. Not because of them, but because of where they have to grow up. I constantly look to the future, what will be

...but today, and maybe tomorrow, and maybe even the next day...I am just going to focus on the now..I think that by doing right by today, the right of tomorrow just might be easier. 

Mikey's first time at the Ocean